8 Tips to Live a Fantastic Family Life

I’m the eldest of six siblings which composed of 3 boys who are next to me and 2 girls. Being the eldest in the family have its ups and downs but these molded me to become the person who I am today.

When I was in elementary, my “baon” or pocket money is just P1.00 – 2.00 a day. I can still buy 4 pieces of candies for .25 cents per piece. I never asked my Mom to give me more than she could. I was contented with what she’s giving me.

I have only two sets of uniform for school. I hand washed them in the evening when my afternoon household chores were finished. And if I forgot to wash my uniforms, Mom would iron it the following morning to dry it. I had only one pair of school shoes.

I lived a very simple life, no TV and no computer or gadgets. As I grow up, I observed that my parents are not interested on material things. I was so happy every time Mom have bought us a new dress but I seldom asked her to buy me new things except if it’s school stuff.

When I was renting a boarding house in college, I had experienced to cook one pancit canton which I ate from breakfast to dinner. My board mates had taught me to eat cornicks like “Bida” and “Boy Bawang” with rice. That’s why, I was sexy and slim during college days. (hahaha…)

Tip 1: Live simply, live within your means.

I have graduated Bachelor of Science Major in Management and must find a job quickly so that I can help my family financially. I wanted my brother who is next to me to go back to school to finish his studies.

I tried to apply to known fast food restaurants and big grocery stores in neighboring towns but I was not lucky. There were long lines of applicants waiting to be interviewed and be hired but I was one of those unfortunates.

My boyfriend, whose now my husband, introduced me to a recruiter in their barangay and so, I went to Lebanon. There was no placement fee but my first three months’ salary would go to the agency. My salary there was 200 U.S. dollar a month. I think the equivalent of that in year 2005 was P9, 000.00 because 1 dollar was 45 pesos back then.

Three months had passed and at the fourth month of working abroad, I told my Lebanese employer to send my salary to my family to pay for my P10, 000.00 debts I incurred while processing my papers. For the next two months, my employer was sending all my salaries in the Philippines but then warned me to set aside some money also for myself.

Tip 2: Save your money.

I followed the advice of my employer and never send all my salaries back home. Sometimes, there were emergencies and that’s the only time that I send bigger amounts. To cut the story short, my money when I came back to the Philippines after 2 years of hard work in other country was P100, 000.00. For a worker earning P9, 000.00 a month only, I was proud that I earned this amount for less than 2 years.

Tip 3: Learn to say NO.

Because I didn’t want to go back abroad again, I tried to search for a job. My Dad accompanied me to his friends and relatives if they knew a job opening but there was no vacancy that suits my course. One of my God mother who was a principal that time in an elementary school told me that if only I was an education graduate, she can help me to apply for a job.

Frustrated, I grabbed again the offer to be a domestic helper in Hongkong. It was a direct hire so, no placement fee. Exactly seven months after I came from Lebanon, I went to another country again. Another challenge, another scrubbing of toilet bowl and so on …

Anyway, are you fond of watching TV or true to life stories? I know what you’re thinking, you’re right, I like watching drama anthology. There was a scene that I have watched that the main character, a wife and a mother went to Italy as a domestic helper and her daughter followed her afterwards. There, the daughter saw her mom kneeling on the floor scrubbing the toilet bowl. She became emotional seeing her Mom’s work. Memories were flashing to her as she reminisced how she spent the money her mom was sending her. She always bought a new bag, new shoes, etc. not knowing the hardships of her Mom just to give what she wanted. Her Mom told her crying, “Dito sa ibang bansa, lahat nagsisimula sa pagkuskos ng inidoro” (Here in abroad, you begin in scrubbing the toilet bowl).

When I was in Hongkong, texts and calls coming from my family asking for money for their needs and I immediately sent them. Text messages like they need P10, 000.00 for the repair of Dad’s jeepney, they will buy a cow, they need a capital for piggery, and told me that they will return it once the pigs are sold. I sent the money they needed but after a few months, I’ve learned that the capital for the piggery was gone and the cow was dead.

I was so disappointed, I told to myself that’s enough. When they text or call me saying they need money, I didn’t give them immediately. When it’s not important, I didn’t send money.

So, what did I do with the rest of my salary? I opened a savings account thinking to have money when I will go home.

Tip 4: Keep growing and learning.

Working abroad was hard. I’m not talking about the job alone but also being away from my family. There were times, that I was reflecting to myself if I’ll be just like other Filipinas who will grow old working here in abroad leaving their families especially their kids? Behind that thought, I enrolled in Master in Business Administration (MBA) in an online course affiliated by a university in the Philippines. It was a great learning. I finished only two semesters, I thought it takes just one year but the school said, I would have to take two more semesters to graduate. I would like to continue my master’s degree but my contract was ending soon, so I chose to go home and never renew my contract again even if my employer wanted me to come back and work for them.

Tip 5: Believe in yourself.

While I was still in Hongkong, I always prayed that I would get a job in the Philippines so I could apply my course. So, before I went back home, I contacted my friends who were already employed if there is job offers in their offices. A close friend of mine encouraged me to submit my resume in their office once I get back home.

Just a few days went by when I came back in the Philippines in July 2010, I submitted my resume and was interviewed by the branch manager of my friend. And in August 11, 2010, I was hired and went to Manila to undergo training.

Our neighbors couldn’t believe that in just one month after I came back; I got employed in a motorcycle company. I couldn’t believe it myself and I was so happy during that time. I remembered playing cards alone during my free time in Hongkong and wishing to have a stable job when I go home.

Tip 6: Don’t build until you haven’t estimated the cost.

Now that I have work, my boyfriend and I planned to settle down after eight years of being in a relationship. We used our savings for our wedding expenses. My boyfriend’s family is not wealthy; he is the only son but his father died when I was in third year college.

We put the money given to us by our sponsors, friends and relatives during our wedding in the bank. Year 2011 was our wedding and up to this writing, year 2018, we never withdraw our joint savings nor partially withdraw it.

Tip 7: Be disciplined and secure the future of your children.

When I was pregnant with our first daughter, the teller of the bank where I deposited the collections of our office encouraged me to open a savings account for our baby once I give birth. So, when I got my Social Security System (SSS) maternity reimbursement, half of it was deposited under the savings account of my baby. We agreed with my husband to put P1, 000.00 each monthly to set aside and save except our individual savings. We did the same practice with our second daughter so both of them have a
savings account. One time, in one of the branches of our company that I’m handling while getting something on my wallet, I accidentally fell down my wallet. All the things inside were scattered on the floor, my money, my ATM card where I’m withdrawing my salary and 3 passbooks. My office mates opened the 3 passbooks and they say, “WOW.” Those were my savings account and the savings account of my two daughters. They began to tease me and they said, “Talagang pinapanindigan mo ang iyong apelyido” (You truly live with your surname). My surname is “Mangornong” is which means EARNING. I just laughed when they threw me jokes like this. Maybe their joke is partially true but most of all, in my mind; I want my children to experience what I didn’t experienced during my childhood but most importantly, I don’t have to worry about their tuition fees when they go to college.

The amount in our savings were just small because I just had a minimum provincial rate salary when I was starting at work with just P7, 280.00. Now, I have influenced some of my girl officemates who were mothers like me to open a savings account for their children.

Tip 8: Learn to invest and have a life insurance.

While my family is growing, I need to have a passive income. A passive income means the money is working from you. One example is investing in a stock market. I was not contented about my income. My husband and I can provide the needs of our children but I was hurting and aching inside. I was thinking about my parents, they are getting old and they didn’t have emergency or retirement funds or any kind of savings. What if they got sick? Where can I get money for them? Admit it or not, if you are married, one of the roots of misunderstandings of spouses is the money you are giving to your parents.

But internet has gone wide today. I came across to the inspirational talks and finance books of the motivational and lay preacher Bro. Bo Sanchez. It opens me to the world of stock investing for a long term and having a life insurance. I was inspired by the story of his maids that became millionaires by faithfully setting aside a fix portion of their salary to invest in the stock market monthly. I was just starting out but it was an enjoyable and worthy learning.

To know more of Bro. Bo’s online club, the Truly Rich Club, simply click here. You will get his best selling book, “My Maid Invests in the Stock Market and Why You Should too.”  If you join his club, he will guide you on how to be truly rich in investing in the stock market which he did with his maids and driver.

The Spiritual Parent

Deuteronomy 6:5-9 NIV

5 Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.6 These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts.7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.9 Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.

In order to be a good parent, first, you must be a good “Son of God the Father”. You must be able to represent and reflect the image of God through your own deeds. Parents who have a heartfelt love for God will leave their children a precious legacy—an intimate relationship with our heavenly Father.

I have witnessed how religious my Dad is since I was a kid. He had no particular role in church that time, but he has a deep love and fear of God, which made him a good servant. In 2005, he officially became an acolyte, just before I graduated from college.

Every Sunday, he encourages us to dress up and go to mass. Sunday is used to be our family day, and we always start it with a morning mass. We used to walk for about four kilometers to attend the mass, but we never feel any exhaustion because we were happily chatting, playing and running after each other.

This is the road we take whenever we go to school, church or town proper. But it was not yet cemented when I was in Elementary School.

We always pray before meals and we can’t start eating without thanking God first for His blessings. He will assign one of us to lead the prayer before and after a meal. He always makes a point to increase our faith and nourish our spiritual being. We even have the “Last Supper” painting in our dining area hanging on the wall with the grace before and after meals.

The grace before meals: Bless us, O Lord! And these Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty, through Christ our Lord. Amen. The grace after meals is “We give Thee thanks for all Thy benefits, O Almighty God, who lives and reigns world without end. Amen.”

These were the two prayers I’ve learned while growing up, except for “Our Father”, which I’ve learned from attending Mass.

I didn’t realize before what it means until I had my own family. My brothers and sisters would always rant about these family rules but we began to love what we’re doing later because we already found joy in serving and worshipping God. He never explained to us why we have to serve and worship God but as we grow old, we learned to understand the meaning and importance of living by God’s grace and mercy. The spiritual beliefs of my Dad is beyond comparison to the belief of other men I have seen. When he is at home, we usually see him listening or humming worship songs and he will gather us together to sing some Christian Songs like Amazing Grace and Ilocano Christian song, “Denggentay,” (Let’s Listen) and he will read us some bible stories and pray before we go to bed.

We were guided throughout our childhood and it was planted to us as we grow older. My dad taught us that to be a servant of God, you have to be a righteous and just at all times. His strong spiritual beliefs he passed unto us will be treasured for the rest of our lives.

A good parent who knows how to teach his children the importance of spirituality is a good parent indeed. He should let his children grow spiritually by teaching them how to pray and guide accordingly through God’s words.

The parents should lead their children to pray. They must bear in mind that “A family that prays together stays together.”

To meet the spiritual needs of your children, you must:

• Read the Bible together as a family.
• Pray together at all times.
• Give your tithes and offerings.
• Hold worthwhile family home evenings.

What has the Lord command us to teach to our children? A good parent must make sure that his children have learned and understand the gospel first at home. Parents should take these opportunities to get closer to their children by listening to their problems and about their goals in life, giving them guidance and spiritual advice that they need.

Time management is one of the most important thing that parents should master. You must know how to balance your time for your family and work.

The joy of living by the gospel of Christ must be shown in your life through religiously giving tithes and offerings and keeping the commandments of God.